In the Beginning - because you must start somewhere !

Oh, I won't go all the way to the beginning, but in order for you to understand where we are today, you must understand who we are. I was born a poor black child- whoops I digress that was Steve Martin's movie..tee hee see this isn't all about doom and gloom it's about life and life is funny at times. Ours is, cancer is and cancer isn't.

This is a disclaimer right now - If you read this and don't like it - don't say anything we don't need to hear it nor do we want to - this journal is for positive feedback only - that is the only part that may not be honest - but it's my truth !!

Just know that in the beginning there was Jannie and Bo, David and Jill, we met, we dated, we all fell in love, some of us quicker than others, David and I, Bo and Jill, then Jill and I,Bo and David - it all worked out. We blended our family. What a great family it is too. The kids had something they always wanted a FAMILY ! A Mom and Dad in a home, a brother and sister, a dog and life began. Almost like the Brandy bunch, but it wasn't - in reality we had x's to deal with, abandoned child issues, major unexpected life turns, deaths, disease, near death experiences and so many to numerous to mention. But with GOD's grace we survived, which leads us to 2010. Where this story begins.

2010 begins like any other year, we have just met the new year with great expectations of what GOD has in store for us. We have daily devotions at our business before work each day with Bo and the staff who want to attend. It is a great way to start the day and we enjoy on more opportunity to share our love the for the LORD with each other. The spiritual growth in our children is a blessing we discuss and pray for ways to allow GOD use us in our Grandchildren's life as well.

Seems now that I must go through this next step because it leads to the diagnosis of glioblastoma multiforme. Easter Weekend is one of my favorite times of the year, Jesus, his death, life and resurrection. It is right up there with Christmas. It is a time when church families come together for celebration. My Mother and Dad were coming to spend Easter weekend for the first time in years with our family. Bo, Jill and all the grandkids would be here.

My parents were so excited to be with their great grandkids and us. It was with great anticipation that we were preparing for our Easter celebration. I had worked long and hard on the Easter program for the church, Bo and Lori were returning from a CVMA fundraiser, Mom and Dad were here and we had decorated eggs with Ian and Carter Dean. GOD was in the house.

We had just returned from Jill and Jeremy's, David wasn't feeling well and had gone downstairs to go to bed, the phone rang, the lady on the line said "this is Jane, Lori's stepmom, Bo and Lori were killed." THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF THE GLIOBLASTOMA MULTIFORME !!

Now how do we know that this is the beginning - well, lifestyle factors, stress play a contributing factor in the diagnosis of Glio. How can someone killing your only son and daughter-in-law not be a stressor.

We move on to October - October 5th to be exact over the past 6 months David has been experiencing lapses in memory, forgetting more than normal things that would be age appropriate. We have been to the doctor has blood test done, waiting on results, changed in meds, could be depression, could be aging..waiting. On October 5th David decided to take our oldest grandson Ian four-wheeling. It is something that he has wanted to do for years and just hadn't taken the time so he said"if I don't do it now something will come up and I will never do it, so tomorrow is the day" On Wednesday off they went. All day long fun filled day Papaw and his boy. What a blast they had - it was great for them and a day of major meltdowns for me.

Wednesday, October 5th I found out that the man who killed Bo and Lori had plead guilty to a guilty reckless driving plea, $145 fine and walked out of the courtroom a free man. He didn't even have to tell the judge that his actions killed two people. That wasn't what made me the maddest, it was the cruel way that the Prosecuting Attorney's office 'FORGOT' after repeated promises to notify us so that we could be in court to see this plea. I get an email after the fact no phone call, nothing. It was appalling the way the victim's family was handled, I have read about it but so far they had treated us better. But no more. I was advised I could call them. NO WAY !!! We had met with them 4 times face to face. The sheer unadulterated gall still makes me angry - but we have no time to waste our energy on that.

When David and Ian got home full of tall tales and laughter I realized where my joy is - not on how bad we were treated, but on how full our hearts were at this moment. GOD'S BLESSING FOR TODAY WERE GREAT !

That night when I told D what had happened, he just looked at me with this blank look on his face, the hurt ran so deep. I just cried, there was no reaction where there should have been something. He just looked at me, his heart broken all over again. Wishing I could take the words away, we gathered each other in a tight embrace and he said "whatever". If you know D, you would know that that is sure sign of a broken man.

The following day is the when the dam broke, they say that the tumor has probably been there for 6 months to maybe a year, that the brain had built a firewall around it - to protect it from the misfires but that one final blow and the misfire broke thru - causing a tonic seizure lasting over 25 minutes - he almost died - GOD was so good - D called me knowing something was wrong and I managed to get home and began our journey to the hospital and the GLIO trip of our lifetime begins.

A biopsy, a misread pathology report and questions abound. We travel to MD Anderson, clarification of pathology a clear treatment plan and we begin again.

Now I will jump forward to February 9th, 2010 - much living has gone on in between the days of October and February, but GOD and I were talking this morning and HE said it was just time to get real - to tell D's story and how it impacts our lives and those around us. It's time to be more than just a spiritual light, but it is time to show the good and the bad, to talk about the struggles of our lives, our concerns, our fears, our laughter's, our family and our needs.

This is were the honesty comes in. This journal is about GLIO and how we live with it everyday. This is a disclaimer right up front - if you read this and offended,please keep your feelings to yourself, we can't and don't need them. If you read this and are inspired to help someone else, pass it on because you feel it could help please do so. If you read this and love it tell us, we need positive cheerful love right now. We live by faith not by fear.


Look back for future updates, email me or message me and I will respond.