Drama or Guilt

Today someone tried to motivate me with drama and or guilt. Their intentions were well placed and the efforts they hope to accomplish were I believe well meaning. However, I am to old to be motivated, moved, angered, impressed or derailed by either drama or guilt. I can feel the power of the prayers others have been praying for me as the fog surrounding me is lifting. I did not guilt anyone into praying for me,it was not because of drama but simply because I asked and because others saw a need and prayed for me. Maybe it's an age thing, maybe it's the loss thing, but the less drama lived around me or near me the happier I am, the less stress in my life, the less turmoil, complaining, bickering and bitching the better off my life is. You can't force others to do what you think needs to be done, you can't judge who is doing the most or the least, you don't know the reasons others choose to help behind the scenes because you can't understand the pain of being in a family. You can't make rhyme or reason of why others don't understand you because you don't understand what motivates them. They don't understand the deep hurts of the past that no matter how many years, tears and lifetimes that go by you can place your self in line to continue to be hurt over and over. The loss of your child and your husband are so deep and fresh that opening wounds from the long ago past are best left buried. To much loss, to much pain, to much heartache, it's best to not allow drama or quilt to drag you back in. So don't try I'm to old and to wise to allow anyone to try to