Letters to GOD about Bo

Dear GOD,

It's about 12:23 a.m. here on your beautiful earth..it has been 12 days since the tragic accident . took him to Heaven. The roller coaster ride has been unbelieveable. I truly do not have the words to say to tell you, but you know what is in my heart and you see the sadness, sorrow and difficulties we are all having. For every tear we shed, you turn around a bring a shout of joy, a prayer of praise, a hug of warmth or a word of encouragement. A card from a long lost friend or someone we have never met.



We went to Ian's first roller skating party tonight for his 8th Birthday party. The kids were so happy the laughter, the falls, the fun and excitment for a brief moment you forgot and then flashes of Bo and his skinny legs, knobby knees and bony elbows entered my mind, Bo had had parties just like this...oh how his Uncle Bo would have loved being there...he would have probably been on skates tormenting that boy..Ian was crying and having a very tough time...his grief comes in spurts and he misses his Uncle Bo so much...the pain in his eyes is evident..he doesn't know what to do with it so he lashes out and we let him...we love him ....and we cry...



Even the smallest things such as dinner in a resturant is so hard, you see people you know, you think everyone is looking at you wondering what you are doing out..your son just died..you cry at the memories of being there with Bo, that people are wondering what your crying about..you know that only person in the world that knows how you feel is sitting across the table from you and their heart is just as broken as yours. Food tastes like paper and you have to make yourself chew and swallow.



GOD, I know that your plan is perfect and I know that our son is where you wanted him to be. You fill me up with I am empty, you make me whole when I am half, you lead me when I blinded by my overflowing tears, you feed me when I am hungry and you are the breath of life that sustains me when I forget to breath. I love you with all my heart and I thank you and praise you that our son loved you as we taught him to. To love you so that we know that he is safe in your arms.



I don't know what you'll tell Bo, but we aren't better, but as his Aunt Juanita said we are making it bearable...maybe just a little...some days are really unbearable, the nights are too long...the days not busy enough, but can you just tell him we miss him and no one every loved that boy as much as his Momma and Daddy except you.


Thank you Lord Jesus for giving be another day of beautiful memories of our son Bo, for Bo's & Jill's Daddy and my loving husband David, for the sunshine, the cool wind, the love of our daughter Jill, our beautiful grandsons, and son-in-law, our wonderful family at the shop, please heal Ms. Theo and Janet, thank you for the CVMA family and the Patriot Guards, for Cheryl and Tony, thank you for all our wonderful support system to numerous to mention. I praise you God for all that you take me through, for lifting me up and carrying me over the fire and into the rain...I love you Lord Jesus with all my heart...



Until tomorrow.



Your loving servant,

Jannie