Today Was Bo Day

Today was my Bo Day ! Today my blog is dedicated to our son Bo. 365 days ago almost to the hour and the minute our son was killed by a reckless driver. His wife Lori was killed with him, but today I am going to talk about Bo. I leave the memories and dedication of Lori up to her family because they knew her much better than I did. She deserves only the best and therefore that is the reason my blog today is dedicated to our son.

When you read this today one thing you need to be clear on is that when I speak of Bo and his Dad, I am speaking of D. He was the who raised him from the age of 6.

Today I drove to the crash site, it is almost un-noticeable now, except for the feeling of dread and nausea that hit me as I came upon. A mother's instinct. It is not some place I visit often, today was only the second time I had been there, but I was drawn there again today for clarity. Didn't get any but maybe I just needed a nice drive on a sunny day.

Then on the cemetery to place flowers at the gravesite - green - military green - Bo's favorite color. He liked greens, browns, tans. Think that is one of the reasons the military fit he so well he loved the color scheme. Sat for a long time at the grave and just talked to GOD and Bo. I know that Bo isn't there, but GOD is GOD is everywhere I am and sometimes I feel better just verbalizing all the things in my heart. Today has been a good day of reflection. Because one year ago today, Bo got to go home to live.

Today I thought about our son and who he was:
He was funny, he was charming, he was oh so handsome! He loved a practical joke as long as it was on someone else. When he was little he hated to be teased. He loved kids, anyones' kids but mostly he loved his nephews. He cherished them. He didn't want kids because he was afraid of being a failure as a father. He was scared of things - he was afraid of heights and thunderstorms. He liked people of all colors, nationalities and religions and he did not tolerate fools lightly.

He was so OPINIONATED and loved to discuss those things near and dear to his heart. He loved his country and served it proudly. He would not put up with those who dishonored his country and it's veteran's. He would have died for any of his soldiers and he believed in what he fought for. He hated the failure of his first marriage and suffered for the pain it caused others. He never understood how a church could annul another churches marriages and think it didn't effect the children. When he hated something and there were things and ways people lived their lives that he truly hated he would not back down.

He loved motorcycles and the military. Two things that never changed all the time he was growing up.

He loved Ozzie so much. He was obsessed with bathrooms. As a child, he put untold stress on himself to be the best at what he did in school to the point of tears if he failed. He was a slob at home. He would borrow his Dad's tools and leave them in the ditch. Later telling Dad he didn't remember doing it. He worked hard, always did and he was honest to a fault. Sometimes if times were hard, if Dad didn't take a paycheck, Bo didn't either.

He loved his sister Jill. Best pals, he looked out for her and he trusted her. They told each other secrets. He loved deeply and completely. He was generous beyond measure - if you needed it and he had it - you got it. He had a temper to. Alot like his Dad's, quick to trigger, short to last and first to ask forgiveness.

He fell hard for Lori the first time he met her. Just like D and I we knew and they knew it. Sometimes love happens that way.

Bo loved his GOD - he always loved GOD. He made me a Arc of the Covenant once. All gold painted popscicle sticks, presented it to me at the front door like a Fed-X delivery. Inside was a dead mouse....like I said he love practical jokes...

He was a big whiner when he was sick - still needing his Momma to take care of him and always always needed to be loved.

Bo loved me, GOD opened up my eyes and showed me all the times during the day the Bo would just call to say "hi, Mom I love you !" All the times when he was sick, even after he was married and no one could make him feel better but me. (yes he was unashamedly a Momma's boy) The many lunch dates, the talks about the decisions he had to make. The hugs around the neck, the nuzzles in the neck when he was a little boy, the sweet kisses on my face, the chocolate roses, life - my life as Bo's Mom - the memories let me know that he loved me.

Today I counted my blessings and thanked GOD for giving me BO for a little while, for letting me be the one that HE chose to put this child's life into. Today I didn't focus on the fact that someone killed him, today I focused on all the good things that came into my life because of my sweet, sweet son Bo !