Christmas 3 & 4 Makes 7

Merry Christmas to all and to all a GREAT day !!

It's hard to believe that this is the 3rd Christmas without D and the fourth without Bo.  I see them both everywhere, I hear them, feel them.  How can it be possible they aren't here?   You won't ever convince me of that.  They continue to live on in the very lives of our family.  Their jokes, their smiles, their traditions and their absences is so palpable we all ache but we carry on.

When I made fudge, I see them fighting over who get's to lick the spoon and pan.  Always had to leave extra so they didn't get jealous because one might get more than the other.  When I wrapped the boys present's I can hear Bo and Jill in the background, "you open mine and tell me what's in it and I'll open yours, that way she can't get mad at us for opening our own presents."  As if !

As we began opening presents I hear D in  my mind "How long is this going to take? Do we have to take turns?"  He wanted everyone to open at once.  Not me, one at time I have to see the expression on each face because I like Christmas to last.  Then when it's over, there is D enjoying every moment of it.

We don't eat a traditional Christmas dinner, no cooking.  One year D, Jill, Bo and I went to Sam's got their pizza's.  D and Bo had meat lovers - GAG - bet it had 10 lbs. of meat on it...we walked the neighborhood at dark, looked at Christmas lights, watched Dumb and Dumber, opened presents and laughed till we hurt.

This year we had Mama Tang's Sweet & Sour Chicken, Jeremy drove us to a neighborhood that had a musical light show that he and Ian had found.  We watched the boys decorate cookies for Santa and Nana Cheryl tried to convince CD that Santa didn't need that much sugar....go figure.

Present time was precious.  This year, when Carter Dean sees his big box wrapped up he thinks it's the same box Uncle Bo gave to Ian years ago.  He heard the story of the empty box with the recorded message from Uncle Bo and he remembers it.  He thinks we saved that box all these years and now he gets. (wish we had.)

When he opens his AK-47 he is so excited because it's an Army gun just like his UNCLE BO's !!!.  He wears his ammo vest, glasses and carries that AK-47 and talks about his Uncle Bo - you feel Bo's presence in the room.  CD brings him to life with his antics.  I can hear Uncle Bo laughing and Papaw saying "take the batteries out."  hahaha

Ian has grown to a new stage, his excitement has changed.  He opens gifts and smiles, thanks you and then when the gift cards and headphones come out the jaw drops...he is actually surprised and excited.  Thankful and blessed for the things he has received. 

Jill is one of the most amazing wife and mother I have seen and she is not bad as a daughter either.  I used to tell the boys "Love you to the moon and back."  After Bo died, we started saying Love you to Heaven and Back.  My most precious gift she gave me is a beautiful bangle with that inscription.  Those were the last words I spoke to D with his last earthly breath.  It is one of the most touching gifts I have ever received.

Christmas this year has been about realizing that my life is full of blessings, people that love me, chances to touch lives around me and be blessed in ways that I never realized possible.  GOD always has a plan.  There are so many people alone and lonely.  So many people hurting and in pain.  We have to grasp every chance to be real, be kind and count our blessings. 
Reach out and let others know that someone cares.  Out of the mouths of my oldest grandson comes some of the sweetest blessings.

Ian watches us each closely and later as he is hugging me goodbye,  he says "say my name"  I said "Ian", he says "say it again" I said "Ian"...he gently pushes me back and looks in my eyes and says "your crying"  he always knows just by the tiniest crack in my voice.  He is very perceptive like his Papaw.  D always knew,  I said "just a little, because I am sooooo happy and blessed, Merry Christmas."  He said "your crying because you miss Papaw and Uncle Bo don't lie to me."  with that I laugh and say "your right, but I am blessed because I have all of you too."  That includes you, you and you !!!!

Merry Christmas my friends !!! May each of you find that one true blessing to make today and everyday worth living.