There I was sitting down to read my Bible and something about Jesus telling HIS disciples to buy a sword if they didn't have one because now was the time to take up their sword made me think of that jeep. I just don't get that, but whatever. Had an appointment first thing to get it fixed and had forgotten all about it. What to do, just keep pretending I forgot or address the issue. Addressed the issue and the jeep is fixed now. Thank you JESUS for it was not as expensive as I thought it might be and that is one tasks off my list.
Worked at the shop for a few hours and tried desperately to handle some of those things that I am not sure what to do but have to do something about.
Life is very interesting when you finally realize that the only person you have to truly depend on is GOD and yourself. It changes your view on everything. You must pray, focus and pray somemore. You must wait, listen and then act accordinly. All decisions rest on your shoulders and those decisions are life changing. Now I realize the stress and hardships that D carried everyday of his life.
Ladies, if your married and own a home, I am here to tell you, your husbands carry many burdens that are unseen, unspoken and unrealized. In some cases unshared. D took care of any home maintenance projects, vehicle issues, large financial issues.
The stress of running two businesses, plus let's be real being married to me, and then our two kids on top of it life was sometimes difficult at best. He took on added financial responsiblities for my family, our children's financial problems, church, friends, our grandchildren and many special projects. Looking back, I am surprised he didn't get awarded sainthood or die of a heart attack years ago. But no, he just kept giving and giving.
D had a givers heart, every dollar he gave to our kids, friends or special projects, he always talked to me about. He always made sure that it was a joint decision, but I would never ever have told him I didn't agree with him. He was most generous.
One of my favorite things about him was his generosity when it came to tipping. He believed that servers did not recieve their fair share so every Saturday on date day someone was going to be rewarded an amazing tip from my loving husband. It is a tip giving gesture I carry on. I have a blessing jar just for those purposes. It delighted him to see the faces on those young people because they had delighted him with their service.
So today when I don't know what to do with what I don't what to do, I focus on D and his ability to do all things for me at all times and I do something. I remember his giving heart, his chartiable nature, his loving spirit, it makes my heart happy and I smile. Today I am blessed to have been taught so much by such a wonderful man, the decisions I make will become easier, the choices I take will become clearer and the blessings I sharte will become a living legacy to the man who carried my burdens without fail for so many years.
JESUS did so much more for me than D and when I focus on HIM, HE was the one who made D's charitable nature, giving heart and loving spirit. Tonight I thank GOD for gifting me this amazing man for all these years. For teaching me these character traits and values by such a GODLY man. Tonight when I close my eyes and sleep there will be a smile on my face and joy in my heart as I remember that my FATHER is watching over me as D celebrates his new life with the GREATEST GIVER OF ALL !
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