The Fine Art of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not easy and sometimes it is not truly heartfelt. Sometimes we ask for it and we don't mean it, we just think that it is the right the do to, someone expects it and it will get us off the hook. Sometimes someone asks us to forgive them and we aren't ready to and our response is guarded, unsure and weak in return.

GOD has taught me much about forgiveness. HE guides me more and more as I pray for wisdom and guidance. Some people are easier to forgive than others and some mistakes are easier to ask for forgiveness than others. Some mistakes take years before you can even get up the courage to ask for forgiveness.

In the past 8 weeks since D's death GOD has given me opportunities to open the door to forgive people who wronged D, Bo and I in our business and personal life. One person was someone that D and Bo stood up for, visited in jail, employed and befriended. A young man who has just recently made an attempt to try to get right with GOD and reconcile with the people he wronged in the past. The first letter I received gave me reason to doubt his sincerity, but I have since changed my mind. GOD has asked that I minister to this young man by forgiving him for D and Bo because they can not do it themselves. The open arms of forgiveness have become a lifeline to CHRIST for this young man. He thought that since D and Bo were in Heaven and he was unable to speak directly to them he could never get that forgiveness. It was not hard to offer to forgive because my wonderful husband saw something redeeming in this young man, he believed that he could be saved if we continued to pray relentlessly and continue to have faith. The struggle for him is hard and difficult, he is in a place that makes being a new believer a great struggle, the first step to his strength in CHRIST may very well be the act of forgiving himself for thinking he failed his friends D and Bo.

Sometimes the opportunity to forgive takes years and years in the making and it is all according to GOD's perfect plan and timing. Today I sat across the desk from someone who had truly caused some very ill and harsh feelings to D and Bo three years ago. This person created hardships where it wasn't necessary, pain and stress beyond measure and betrayal. If only we had all communicated better maybe today wouldn't have happened. But, GOD in HIS wonderful wisdom had given me time to prepare, pray and meditate before this encounter. The air of forgiveness was everywhere, tears were shed, heartfelt apologies were given and accepted. You see the difference is that after 3 years, after 2 deaths, after much prayer and reflection, it is not about D, Bo, me or this other person. It is about GOD, it is about the act of complete and geniune forgiveness. I can now lay this matter aside and not pick it up again. I have been able to forgive and forget. In my mind not only is GOD saying "Well done my child", but D is proud of me for handling the situation this way and Bo saw the example of the behavior I tried to teach him and Jill - "forgive and be forgiven."

Looking back on my life, the mistakes I have made and the people I need to have forgive me, I wonder how long it will be before GOD opens the door of forgiveness to change another life I have encounter as HE continues to mold me and make me.